Wednesday 30 January 2013

This week: The song I Am Aren't Listening To

"Sky Dish fall"

This is the end
I can't believe the dish has fallen off again
Straight passed the patio window and then
Hear my temper burst again

For this is the end
I was just watching Glee then the signal went
So overdue I rang them
£40 quid a month they've stolen

Why'd the Sky dish fall?
When it crumbles
Will Sky stand tall?
Face it all together?

Why'd the Sky dish fall?
When it crumbles
 Will Sky stand tall?
Face it all together?
 Sky dish falls
Sky dish falls

Sky dish fall was just the start
A thousand emails and poles apart
Where worlds collide and screens are dark
You may have my customer number, you can take my name
But you'll never have my renewal

Why'd the Sky dish fall? (why'd the Sky dish fall?)
When it crumbles (when it crumbles)
 Will Sky stand tall? (Will Sky stand tall)
Face it all together? (Face it all together?)
 Sky dish falls
Sky dish falls

Why'd the Sky dish fall? (why'd the Sky dish fall?)
When it crumbles (when it crumbles)
 Will Sky stand tall? (Will Sky stand tall)
Face it all together? (Face it all together?)
 Sky dish falls

[x2:]
(Why'd the Sky dish fall?
When it crumbles
We Sky stand tall?)

Where you go I go
What you see I don't see
I know I'd never be me
Without the Sky security
Of your channel charms
Keeping me from harm
Put the remote in my hand
And we'll stand

Why'd the Sky dish fall? (why'd the Sky dish fall?)
When it crumbles (when it crumbles)
 Will Sky stand tall? (Will Sky stand tall)
Face it all together? (Face it all together?)
 Sky dish falls

Why'd the Sky dish fall? (why'd the Sky dish fall?)
When it crumbles (when it crumbles)
 Will Sky stand tall? (Will Sky stand tall)
Face it all together? (Face it all together?)
 Sky dish falls

Let the Sky dish fall
Will Sky stand tall?
As Sky dish falls
Oh shit!

Monday 7 January 2013

This week:Reginald Gardener's Encrypted Passwords

Reginald Gardener's Encrypted Passwords was a game created in the 1996 for a never released system, The  Rothchester Smythe Ellipse 5.

The game its self centred around the adventures of the title character "Reginald Gardener".
In the game you are tasked with locating all the lost passwords that Reginald has has forgotten due to an unfortunate accident.

The game starts as our protagonist leaves his office at the keyring, gonk, factory. The thought bubble above Reginald's head states "WHAT A TERRIBLE DAY AT THE KEYRING GONK FACTORY!" and in the next: "AND NOW IT'S DARK AND STARTED RAINING!" Reginald then begins to make his way home in the rain, flustered and tired.

As Reginald is guided down the street by the player, he passes a local fast food restaurant called "OdOnallds". Outside there appears to be 3 teenage lads "fooling around" in a food fight. Reg' pays no head and continues home. But without warning, one of the Chicken Nuggets being thrown, misses its target and strikes Reg' on the back of the head!

The screen fades to black, then fades back in to see our hero sitting on the curb dazed. As Reg' rubs his head the thought bubble reads "WHA.. WHAT HAPPENED?" then another reads "OH NO THE NUGGET! MY FRAGILE MIND! THE ENCRYPTED PASSWORDS FOR THE KEYRING GONK FACTORY!"

So begins an adventure of a top down view point, in an 8 bit universe. From here on in Reg' will be tasked with visiting a vast universe comprised of important levels like "Mothers Maiden Name" and "First School Attended".

The game its self was created by twins John and Kevin Syllabus, along with the Ellipse 5 in there porta cabin workshop in Hyde. Bitz Bytez and Knobbly Bits magazine interviewed them at the time to see what they had created. Impressed as the reporter was with the game and the machine, he was unnerved by the brothers being "conjoined twins".

The twins themselves refused to be photographed for fear of being mocked, but did let the machine and game to be photographed. As much as companies and individuals showed interest, the machine never saw production.

It was as late as 2005 that reporter Daniel Jackson5 decided to compose a "Where are they now?" story for the brothers. Upon visiting the porta cabin, he found a very run down site with over grown ivy and little signs of life. On entering the open door, he spotted a figure sitting on the floor, wrapped in a blanket. The figure sat amongst the dishevelled work shop junk, playing a game.

The reporter never completed the assignment, and only after his suicide in 2012 (run over himself with a steam roller), the story and suicide note were found in his house. It tells of the fateful night he visited the twins. How the figure never turned away from the game, and only sAID ON THING:

"KEVIN WAS A SHORT SIGHTED IDIOT. WE COULD HAVE BEEN MILLIONAIRES. SO I STRANGLED HIM!"

The hunched figure dropped the blanket to reveal a bearded John, connected to a skeleton.